Theories of sexuality, culture and modern personhood rarely take account of differences in the construction of sexuality between advanced industrial nations. This article reveals different conceptions and management of adolescent sexuality among white, middle-class American and Dutch parents of teenagers. The American parents describe adolescent sexuality as a biologically driven, individually based activity which causes disruption to the teenager as well as to the family. The Dutch parents, by contrast, emphasize the love relationships and social responsibility of teenagers which make (...) their sexuality a `normal' phenomenon. The American parents exclude the sexuality of teenagers from conversation and the family while the Dutch parents accommodate culturally prescribed forms of teenage sexuality within the home. The article demonstrates how the two constructions of adolescent sexuality, and the conceptions of personhood and social life that engender them, constitute fundamentally different cultural logics. Without denying variations within the two countries, or overlaps between them, it suggests that different dominant understandings of sexuality and the individual have prevailed in the USA and the Netherlands. (shrink)