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The Human Condition and the Gift: Towards a Theoretical Perspective on Close Relationships

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Abstract

Hannah Arendt’s exposition of the human condition provides the basic framework for a theoretical perspective on close relationships. According to Arendt, the human condition is comprised of three modes of activity: labor, work, and action. Labor is need-driven behavior, work concerns goal-directed activity and the fabrication of things, and action involves the mutual validation of unique individuals. Within this framework, the gift is the means by which relational ties are made concrete. I propose a model of gift-giving organized by two axes: whether or not the partner is singularized by the gift and whether or not the gift is given with an expectation of a return gift. I then apply this model to the three modes of the human condition.

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Notes

  1. In many cases, such behaviors result in more direct disconfirmation of the person (e.g., teasing). Overlooking, then, redresses the potential for loss of face. Nevertheless, even if momentarily, the offender is treated as if he/she did not exist, or at least, not as a social person.

  2. In nature, one finds only species. Individual specimens may display different behavior patterns (e.g., an alpha male), but these differences do not make them unique individuals. This same argument can be turned back upon we ourselves: dominance displays do not make us unique as persons.

  3. Arendt contends that the capacity for speech is “the decisive distinction between human and animal life” (1998, p. 205). Both humans and other animals emit behavior and can communicate with sounds, but only human beings can speak. I infer that the greatness of deeds is at least partially bestowed upon certain kinds of human behaviors precisely by speaking of them.

  4. In the modern age, the distinction between work and labor sometimes get blurred. Many jobholders are not “craftsmen” in the traditional sense of fabricating objects. In fact, they may work on only a small part of a larger production process. Nevertheless, the job may involve a level of cognitive activity (e.g., goal-setting, planning) that is not found in traditional manual labor. This cognitive activity is what would allow them to be classified as homo faber.

  5. Though many jobholders work on projects with teams, each individual typically brings the results of his or her own independent cognitive activity to the table, where those contributions are then coordinated toward completion of the project.

  6. To the jobholder, time spent attending to the relational level rather than the task level of a group project may be perceived as “idle busybodyness and idle talk” (Arendt 1998, p. 208). To the worker, information is a necessary means to achieving the end; for the citizen, information is an end in itself.

  7. This view is consistent with a discussion of charitable giving advanced by Eileen et al. (1996). The point of their analysis was to raise the possibility of discounting such donations as gifts. However, their analysis began with a failure to support hypotheses regarding sex differences and charitable giving. Specifically, they found that men and women did not differ in charitable giving at Christmastime. Given that donors do not expect a return and do not validate the recipient with their giving, no social tie is required. Hence, there is no reason to expect differences by sex or gender in donating.

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Acknowledgments

I would like to thank Lisa Miczo, as well as Lenore Langsdorf and two anonymous reviewers, for feedback on earlier drafts of this paper.

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Correspondence to Nathan Miczo.

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An earlier version of this paper was presented to the Interpersonal Communication Division, National Communication Association convention, Chicago, IL, November 2004.

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Miczo, N. The Human Condition and the Gift: Towards a Theoretical Perspective on Close Relationships. Hum Stud 31, 133–155 (2008). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10746-008-9084-y

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